The Road to WrestleMania:
WrestleMania
Date: March 31, 1985
Location: New York City, New York
Venue: Madison Square Garden
Attendance: 19,121
Overview: We start off with a nifty(for its time) video package, set to some apropos 80's hair metal sounded music. Gorilla, with his partner Jesse 'The Body' Ventura, welcomes us to WrestleMania. He throws it to the Fink, who asks us to rise for the singing of our National Anthem. The WWF's own! Mean Gene Okerlund does the honors. A bit of an odd choice, given all of the other star power Vince was able to book for this show. That said, it's certainly not the worst rendition I've ever heard. The fans are pumped so they aren't exactly a tough audience to win over. We go backstage for the first of many pre-match promos. Tito and the 'undefeated' Executioner is our first matchup. The Executioner promises to target Santana's injured knee, which was the center piece of Santana's at the time feud with Greg Valentine over the Intercontinental Title. Why wasn't that match on this card as opposed to what we got?
The Executioner vs. Tito Santana - Gorilla starts what would be a life long trend by claiming that the fans in MSG are 'hanging from the rafters'. The Executioner is of course 'Playboy' Buddy Rose, pre-weight gain. I'm not sure if he actually actively worked this gimmick around the time of this show or if he was a one-off sort of character for the purpose of making 'Chico' look good. We start off hot with a criss-cross spot as the Executioner takes a powder to the floor. "Woodstock was to rock 'n' roll what WrestleMania is to wrestling, Gorilla," Jesse proclaims. Monsoon agrees, further putting over Mania. Santana had at this point lost the IC title to Greg 'The Hammer' Valentine and was in the process of chasing him to regain the title, which he would do later this year in a fantastic cage match at the Boston Garden. Executioner gets tossed off the top rope in the style of Ric Flair. Executioner smartly targets the leg just as he predicted he would do, playing off year long psychology. Santana locks on a Figure-4 out of nowhere and gets the pin. *1/2. Match was basically just a showcase for the Santana/Valentine feud and did so quite well, even if the actual match wasn't much to write home about.
We throw it back to his lordship, Alfed Hayes for words with the combatants of the next contest, King Kong Bundy and S. D. Jones.
King Kong Bundy vs. S.D. Jones - The notorious 'record breaking' squash as Bundy beats him in seconds after the Avalanche. This was the beginning of Bundy's year long push to challenge Hogan at Mania 2. Seeing as how Bundy successfully was built up as a threat to Hogan's title by the time of Mania 2, this has to be seen as an effective squash. Ventura with a nice line, saying, "Bundy's back is so big it could be used as the west screen at the drive in". Match was a legit twenty seconds from bell to bell, though Howard Finkel announces it at eight seconds(although Monsoon calls it nine). 1/2*, just for successfully starting Bundy's main event push.
Okerlund interviews 'Maniac' Matt Borne and Ricky Steamboat for their upcoming match. Borne claims that Steamboat is too nice a guy to possibly beat him. On the flip side, Steamboat respectfully refers to his opponent as 'Mister Maniac Matt Borne'. Was that a botch or was Borne accurate when calling Steamboat a nice guy? Camera cuts ringside for a nice fade away look at Jesse Ventura's stunning powder pink tuxedo.
'Maniac' Matt Borne vs. Ricky Steamboat - Not quite 'the Dragon' as of yet. Jesse points that Borne is a second generation superstar as his father was 'Tough' Tony Borne. Borne a lost member of legacy perhaps? Decent, if perhaps uneventful, match here. Dynamite signature line from Gorilla, describing the point of impact from Steamboat's belly-to-back suplex as being Borne's 'external occipital protuberance on the back of the head'. Just tremendous. A standard good guy high cross body from the top finishes it for Steamboat. Monsoon ridiculously claims that he traveled '15 feet across the ring' in the midst of the move. *1/2. Not much in terms of a story was told here, just a brief exhibition to highlight Steamboat.
To the back again as we hear from He refers to Brutus Beefcake and David Sammartino as 'really great stars'. Okay... David is bland as all hell but isn't brutal on the stick honestly. However, Beefcake's manager Johnny Valiant is tremendous. It's a shame he was never given an actual run managing a legit singles heel. He has a wonderfully sleazy mustache here which doesn't hurt his overness. Brutus Beefcake makes a fart noise rather than cut a promo when prompted by Mean Gene.
David Sammartino vs. Brutus Beefcake - Beefcake for some odd reason is billed as being from Parts Unknown. David's father, Bruno, gets the biggest pop of the night so far. Just insane the ovation he gets. Beefcake was a pretty darn good arrogant heel, as he does the old Zbyszko stall to begin this match. The announce team admire Beefcake's tights. Monsoon says for the first time another would-be WrestleMania catchphrase of his, "This is definitely a happening." Beefcake just totally outclasses David in terms of charisma here. Monsoon and Ventura, perhaps desperately seeking for a context to this boring ass match, overstate exactly what is at stake here. Ventura claims, "whoever loses, his career is gonna drop six months to a year behind. Maybe two years just to get back in position". Arighty then. We start off with Brutus Beefcake CHAIN WRESTLING!!, letting Sammartino get the advantage. The action renders the fans speechless in amazement. Just nothing going on, action wise, so far in this match. David Sammartino gives David Flair a real run for his money as the most disappointing second generation wrestler. Match is just rest-hold city until the two take it to the floor and the managers get involved, including a huge pop when Bruno gets his hands on the heel duo. Match ends in a double DQ. 1/2*, solely for the work of Valiant and Sammartino.
Intermission time. The commentating duo throws it to the back once more as Mean Gene is with Greg Valentine and the Junk Yard Dog. Valentine calls himself the master of the Figure-Four and the greatest IC champ of all time and I don't disagree with him. The Hammer was at his absolute peak here. JYD cuts his standard promo, dog references abound.
Greg 'The Hammer' Valentine vs. Junk Yard Dog - The IC title is up for grabs and we have a time limit of an hour. Here's to hoping for a Broadway! Valentine with massive heat upon his introduction. JYD's 'Another One Bites the Dust' entrance is overdubbed with 'Grab Them Cakes' in a major downgrade, although 'Grab Them Cakes' was a decent, campy, 1980's entrance theme. Ventura says of Valentine that he is "definitely a wrestling champion." Was that up for dispute or something? Jimmy Hart is in the corner of Valentine. Monsoon doubles and even triples down in the same sentence his previous claim of WrestleMania being a "Happening." I know that Valentine was pushed up the card upon his jumping from Mid-Atlantic to New York including a run versus Backlund which even featured a 'Dusty Finish' where The Hammer appeared to have won the WWF title. But damn if he shouldn't have gotten a legit run with the title or at the very least a longer run towards or at the top of the card in this time period. He would hit a wall towards the late 80's and become a shell of his former self, but he was among the best in the business in my own humble opinion from the late 70s up through 1986, both in terms of in-ring work as well as his promos. My praise for the Hammer will be challenged here in attempting to drag something watchable out of JYD. The utter boredom of this match again makes me wonder why they didn't just do Valentine vs. Tito for the title. But I know that it was a different era and the major money was in Tito chasing Valentine on the house show circuit. A true master of psychology, the Hammer works the leg of JYD to soften him up for the Figure-Four. JYD gets in some hope spots and despite his horribleness, the fans are into him. Gorilla Monsoon says this is a 'happening' for the fourth time of the night. I get the feeling he and Ventura were playing a Super Troopers type of game where Monsoon bet Jesse just how many times he could say the word 'happening' over the course of the show. Valentine does the work of two men here and sells JYD's headbutts like death. Jimmy Hart up on the ring apron and Hammer accidentally nails him in a big heat spot. Valentine scoops the legs of the 'Dog and pins him with his legs on the ropes. Tito runs out to bemoan the Hammer's antics. I dog the green strapped IC title. In a total bullshit spot, the ref reverses the decision on the hearsay of Santana alone, restarts the match, and promptly counts out The Hammer. The fans cheering so wildly feels about as foolish as the reaction to Lex Luger winning in similar fashion at Summer Slam '93 over Yoko. Your man didn't win the title, stop cheering, you rubes. * for Valentine's work alone. Monsoon's 'Pearl Harbor' references feel racist to this P.C. millennial.
Backstage to talk to Volkoff/Sheik and the U.S. Express. The heels have 'Classy' Freddie Blassie with them. Okerlund calls Capt. Lou a 'fashion plate'. He speaks for the blue chip babyfaces and says they are going to 'try real hard' in this match. Well that's pretty honest I suppose if not intimidating. Okerlund asks for Windham's opinion. His only reply? "We're on our way to the ring right now." That's it? It's not even true as the interview was pre-taped and the Express are in their street clothes. What a bastard you are, Windham.
The U.S. Express vs. The Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff - This is for the WWF Tag Team titles, held at the time by Rotundo and Windham. Unfortunately the Express' 'Born in the U.S.A.' theme is overdubbed. Vince, as was as the Reagan campaign a year earlier, must have been completely oblivious as to what that song was actually about. Volkoff performs a glorious rendition of the Soviet anthem, actually getting through the entirety of it unlike Mania 3. "Russia number one. Iran number one. U.S.A. *hawk pew*." Excellent heeling. The Express' replacement music is horrible. How in the world did Vince let Barry Windham slip away to Crockett after this? The dude was 6 foot 4 or 5 and could fucking GO in the ring. He was a younger, non juiced up version of Hogan who could also work 5 star match. I have no idea what Vince was thinking. The match has a ton of heat. This is close to the time that the Sheik utterly deteriorated physically but he can still work his ass off here. Even the ordinarily bland as all hell Rotunda shows some fire here and gets the fans popping. Volkoff was one of the wrestlers linked to Zahorian during the steroid trials and I'm watching this wondering how. The guy was seemingly always a pale, shapeless crowd killer. Rotundo plays Ricky Morton here during a long heat segment. Not the cleanest formula tag match. Windham hits a nice bulldog to a big pop, only for Sheik to save the big Russian. Fred Blassie cane shot puts Rotundo down for the three count and we have NEW Tag Team Champions! "History has been made," says Gorilla, in yet another one of his anachronisms. **1/2. Good stuff.
We head to the gorilla position where Okerlund is with the winners of the tag match. Okerlund is shocked and chagrinned. He interviews Blassie who is beside himself. Okerlund asks to see the infamous cane to which Blassie replies, "What cane? I didn't have no cane." Sheik adds, "You know Gene Mean, we proven to the thousand thousand Iranian, New York City, and a Russia, and a Arab, a all countries the best. We come a to the America to prove it. Look at us. Number one!" Tremendous stuff.
Lord Al Hayes hypes up the Bodyslam challenge, awkwardly I might add. Okerlund interviews Studd and Heenan. Studd has the bag of money which he claims was 'the bait' to get Andre to put his career on the line. Pretty clever booking. It's a nice WWF duffle bag. Were those ever offered in the merchandise catelog? I'd buy one of those in a second.
Andre the Giant vs. 'Big' John Studd - This is of course a 'Body Slam Challenge', meaning the match will only end when one man slams the other. Also at stake is $15,000 for the winner as well as Andre's career, should he lose. Studd is accompanied by Heenan, in unfortunately his only appearance of the evening. Hot match from the get go as both of these guys were majorly over, even if they couldn't do much of anything in the ring. Lots of lumbering around early but the crowd eats it up. Studd works the gimmick and tries for a slam or two on Andre. Crowd chants "Slam! Slam!" Crazy heat. Lots of rest holds here before Andre eventually gets the big slam on Studd. He gets the bag of cash and gives some to the fans ring side before the Brain gets the back and runs to the back. *
Back to Lord Al and Mene Gean for words with the ladies. Cindy Lauper cuts the promo for Richter. Richter sounds like a hick so having Lauper talk for her was a plus. Moolah is with Kai, and she too is clearly a southern gal. Gene Mean likes the shades on Moolah, as they are impressive but look silly on a 60 year old woman.
Wendi Richter vs. Lelani Kai - Match is for the Women's Championship, held by Richter. Richter, of course, would soon after this event be screwed out of her title by the mysterious Spider Woman, 12 years before the more famous Montreal Screwjob but under similar circumstances. Kai is the champion going in to this match. Lauper leads Richter to the ring to a giant pop. Realistically, women's wrestling wouldn't be this over again until 13 years later with Sable and even that is debatable. Decent generic chain wrestling starts this off. We then progress into the standard 80s women's wrestling spots(moves centered around pulling of the hair.) Richter with the airplane spin for a near fall. Kai with some crowd killing stomps for another 2 followed by a horrible looking back breaker. Kai goes to the top for a high cross body but Richter rolls through(very, very awkwardly) and wins the match and the title for the second time. Kai attacks after the bell while Moolah gets in the ring and starts taking belly-first bumps for no reason..... What the hell? She takes three or four belly bumps with no one around her. Lauper and her manager David Wolfe celebrate with Wendi Richter. 1/2*.
Okerlund is in the back with Richter who calls this the happiest second of her life. Lauper says she never doubted Richter and trash talks Moolah and Kai.
The announce team throws it to the Fink for some introductions. Guest ring announcer is Billy Martin. Monsoon says HAPPENING for the umpteenth time. Martin introduces Liberace but doesn't say what his official role in this match is. Monsoon literally says HAPPENING 60 seconds after he last said it. Liberace comes in and dances with the Rockettes. This is a happening, Monsoon once again says. I swear he's trolling me from the grave. Crowd is HOT for the intro of Muhammed Ali.
After a night where each match was preceded by an interview with the combatants, I'm shocked that we at the very least don't get to hear a Hogan promo. Roddy Piper comes out with the bag pipers along with his partner Paul Orndorff and bodyguard Bob Orton. Pat Patterson is unidentified but he is your referee, assigned by Vince in order to help out the inexperienced Mr. T. Huge pop as you would expect for Hogan, T, and Snuka.
Hulk Hogan & Mr. T vs. Paul Orndorff & Roddy Piper - Ventura says upon removing his robe that Ornorff looks like a greek god. Patterson struggles to gain control of this one even before the bell rings. Ventura reiterates his greek god comment. Monsoon calls this the 'happening of the century'. Hogan and Piper start it off but Mr. T screams for Hulk and begs him to let him get his hands on Piper. Hogan really milks it and the crowd goes ape shit for it. Piper really with some great facials as he looks disgusted by T. They trade some slaps and some chain wrestling but neither can gain the upper hand. Mr. T gets Piper up in the old airplane spin and drops him like 'yesterday's newspaper'. Tag in to Hogan and we get a pier-6 brawl with all 6 men including the managers in the ring. Ali is even forced to get in the ring to restore some order to this match. Piper decides to take a powder and get back to the locker room. Monsoon says that this wont be tolerated and that Piper and Orndorff will have to return. According to who, Monsoon? With the heels back in the ring, Hogan makes short work of the both of them. The heels finally get control through some chicanery and Hogan plays the face in peril. Orndorff and Piper used every old school heel tag team tactic in the book for monster heat from the MSG faithful. Mr. Wonderful with the BACKDROP DRIVAH! on Hogan for two. Snuka decides to get involved for no reason and out of nowhere we get the finishing spot of Bob Orton missing the cast shot from the top rope and hitting Orndorff instead. Hogan and T are your winners but the finish came out of nowhere and the match didn't have much to it. **.
They wrap up with promos from the winning team. Standard fare. Gorilla and Jesse the wrap things up on there end while Monsoon, once more for good measure, confirms that this was indeed a 'happening' as he bids farewell to the audience.
This show sucks. Well let me rephrase that, the wrestling on this show sucks. At this time, NWA had matches like Magnum T.A. and Tully Blanchard in their I Quit match and Ric Flair having a 4 star match with the top babyface in each territory in the country while on this show the top match gets 2 1/2 stars. But the in ring work isnt why this card is memorable. The production was slick for its time and the celebrity rub was top notch. The celebs didn't feel bothered to be there or that they were above the show but rather seemed enthused by the product and their stardom truly rubbed off on those they interacted with. In short, above all else, this event was indeed, 'a happening.'
----ljf----
Overview: We start off with a nifty(for its time) video package, set to some apropos 80's hair metal sounded music. Gorilla, with his partner Jesse 'The Body' Ventura, welcomes us to WrestleMania. He throws it to the Fink, who asks us to rise for the singing of our National Anthem. The WWF's own! Mean Gene Okerlund does the honors. A bit of an odd choice, given all of the other star power Vince was able to book for this show. That said, it's certainly not the worst rendition I've ever heard. The fans are pumped so they aren't exactly a tough audience to win over. We go backstage for the first of many pre-match promos. Tito and the 'undefeated' Executioner is our first matchup. The Executioner promises to target Santana's injured knee, which was the center piece of Santana's at the time feud with Greg Valentine over the Intercontinental Title. Why wasn't that match on this card as opposed to what we got?
The Executioner vs. Tito Santana - Gorilla starts what would be a life long trend by claiming that the fans in MSG are 'hanging from the rafters'. The Executioner is of course 'Playboy' Buddy Rose, pre-weight gain. I'm not sure if he actually actively worked this gimmick around the time of this show or if he was a one-off sort of character for the purpose of making 'Chico' look good. We start off hot with a criss-cross spot as the Executioner takes a powder to the floor. "Woodstock was to rock 'n' roll what WrestleMania is to wrestling, Gorilla," Jesse proclaims. Monsoon agrees, further putting over Mania. Santana had at this point lost the IC title to Greg 'The Hammer' Valentine and was in the process of chasing him to regain the title, which he would do later this year in a fantastic cage match at the Boston Garden. Executioner gets tossed off the top rope in the style of Ric Flair. Executioner smartly targets the leg just as he predicted he would do, playing off year long psychology. Santana locks on a Figure-4 out of nowhere and gets the pin. *1/2. Match was basically just a showcase for the Santana/Valentine feud and did so quite well, even if the actual match wasn't much to write home about.
We throw it back to his lordship, Alfed Hayes for words with the combatants of the next contest, King Kong Bundy and S. D. Jones.
King Kong Bundy vs. S.D. Jones - The notorious 'record breaking' squash as Bundy beats him in seconds after the Avalanche. This was the beginning of Bundy's year long push to challenge Hogan at Mania 2. Seeing as how Bundy successfully was built up as a threat to Hogan's title by the time of Mania 2, this has to be seen as an effective squash. Ventura with a nice line, saying, "Bundy's back is so big it could be used as the west screen at the drive in". Match was a legit twenty seconds from bell to bell, though Howard Finkel announces it at eight seconds(although Monsoon calls it nine). 1/2*, just for successfully starting Bundy's main event push.
Okerlund interviews 'Maniac' Matt Borne and Ricky Steamboat for their upcoming match. Borne claims that Steamboat is too nice a guy to possibly beat him. On the flip side, Steamboat respectfully refers to his opponent as 'Mister Maniac Matt Borne'. Was that a botch or was Borne accurate when calling Steamboat a nice guy? Camera cuts ringside for a nice fade away look at Jesse Ventura's stunning powder pink tuxedo.
'Maniac' Matt Borne vs. Ricky Steamboat - Not quite 'the Dragon' as of yet. Jesse points that Borne is a second generation superstar as his father was 'Tough' Tony Borne. Borne a lost member of legacy perhaps? Decent, if perhaps uneventful, match here. Dynamite signature line from Gorilla, describing the point of impact from Steamboat's belly-to-back suplex as being Borne's 'external occipital protuberance on the back of the head'. Just tremendous. A standard good guy high cross body from the top finishes it for Steamboat. Monsoon ridiculously claims that he traveled '15 feet across the ring' in the midst of the move. *1/2. Not much in terms of a story was told here, just a brief exhibition to highlight Steamboat.
To the back again as we hear from He refers to Brutus Beefcake and David Sammartino as 'really great stars'. Okay... David is bland as all hell but isn't brutal on the stick honestly. However, Beefcake's manager Johnny Valiant is tremendous. It's a shame he was never given an actual run managing a legit singles heel. He has a wonderfully sleazy mustache here which doesn't hurt his overness. Brutus Beefcake makes a fart noise rather than cut a promo when prompted by Mean Gene.
David Sammartino vs. Brutus Beefcake - Beefcake for some odd reason is billed as being from Parts Unknown. David's father, Bruno, gets the biggest pop of the night so far. Just insane the ovation he gets. Beefcake was a pretty darn good arrogant heel, as he does the old Zbyszko stall to begin this match. The announce team admire Beefcake's tights. Monsoon says for the first time another would-be WrestleMania catchphrase of his, "This is definitely a happening." Beefcake just totally outclasses David in terms of charisma here. Monsoon and Ventura, perhaps desperately seeking for a context to this boring ass match, overstate exactly what is at stake here. Ventura claims, "whoever loses, his career is gonna drop six months to a year behind. Maybe two years just to get back in position". Arighty then. We start off with Brutus Beefcake CHAIN WRESTLING!!, letting Sammartino get the advantage. The action renders the fans speechless in amazement. Just nothing going on, action wise, so far in this match. David Sammartino gives David Flair a real run for his money as the most disappointing second generation wrestler. Match is just rest-hold city until the two take it to the floor and the managers get involved, including a huge pop when Bruno gets his hands on the heel duo. Match ends in a double DQ. 1/2*, solely for the work of Valiant and Sammartino.
Intermission time. The commentating duo throws it to the back once more as Mean Gene is with Greg Valentine and the Junk Yard Dog. Valentine calls himself the master of the Figure-Four and the greatest IC champ of all time and I don't disagree with him. The Hammer was at his absolute peak here. JYD cuts his standard promo, dog references abound.
Greg 'The Hammer' Valentine vs. Junk Yard Dog - The IC title is up for grabs and we have a time limit of an hour. Here's to hoping for a Broadway! Valentine with massive heat upon his introduction. JYD's 'Another One Bites the Dust' entrance is overdubbed with 'Grab Them Cakes' in a major downgrade, although 'Grab Them Cakes' was a decent, campy, 1980's entrance theme. Ventura says of Valentine that he is "definitely a wrestling champion." Was that up for dispute or something? Jimmy Hart is in the corner of Valentine. Monsoon doubles and even triples down in the same sentence his previous claim of WrestleMania being a "Happening." I know that Valentine was pushed up the card upon his jumping from Mid-Atlantic to New York including a run versus Backlund which even featured a 'Dusty Finish' where The Hammer appeared to have won the WWF title. But damn if he shouldn't have gotten a legit run with the title or at the very least a longer run towards or at the top of the card in this time period. He would hit a wall towards the late 80's and become a shell of his former self, but he was among the best in the business in my own humble opinion from the late 70s up through 1986, both in terms of in-ring work as well as his promos. My praise for the Hammer will be challenged here in attempting to drag something watchable out of JYD. The utter boredom of this match again makes me wonder why they didn't just do Valentine vs. Tito for the title. But I know that it was a different era and the major money was in Tito chasing Valentine on the house show circuit. A true master of psychology, the Hammer works the leg of JYD to soften him up for the Figure-Four. JYD gets in some hope spots and despite his horribleness, the fans are into him. Gorilla Monsoon says this is a 'happening' for the fourth time of the night. I get the feeling he and Ventura were playing a Super Troopers type of game where Monsoon bet Jesse just how many times he could say the word 'happening' over the course of the show. Valentine does the work of two men here and sells JYD's headbutts like death. Jimmy Hart up on the ring apron and Hammer accidentally nails him in a big heat spot. Valentine scoops the legs of the 'Dog and pins him with his legs on the ropes. Tito runs out to bemoan the Hammer's antics. I dog the green strapped IC title. In a total bullshit spot, the ref reverses the decision on the hearsay of Santana alone, restarts the match, and promptly counts out The Hammer. The fans cheering so wildly feels about as foolish as the reaction to Lex Luger winning in similar fashion at Summer Slam '93 over Yoko. Your man didn't win the title, stop cheering, you rubes. * for Valentine's work alone. Monsoon's 'Pearl Harbor' references feel racist to this P.C. millennial.
Backstage to talk to Volkoff/Sheik and the U.S. Express. The heels have 'Classy' Freddie Blassie with them. Okerlund calls Capt. Lou a 'fashion plate'. He speaks for the blue chip babyfaces and says they are going to 'try real hard' in this match. Well that's pretty honest I suppose if not intimidating. Okerlund asks for Windham's opinion. His only reply? "We're on our way to the ring right now." That's it? It's not even true as the interview was pre-taped and the Express are in their street clothes. What a bastard you are, Windham.
The U.S. Express vs. The Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff - This is for the WWF Tag Team titles, held at the time by Rotundo and Windham. Unfortunately the Express' 'Born in the U.S.A.' theme is overdubbed. Vince, as was as the Reagan campaign a year earlier, must have been completely oblivious as to what that song was actually about. Volkoff performs a glorious rendition of the Soviet anthem, actually getting through the entirety of it unlike Mania 3. "Russia number one. Iran number one. U.S.A. *hawk pew*." Excellent heeling. The Express' replacement music is horrible. How in the world did Vince let Barry Windham slip away to Crockett after this? The dude was 6 foot 4 or 5 and could fucking GO in the ring. He was a younger, non juiced up version of Hogan who could also work 5 star match. I have no idea what Vince was thinking. The match has a ton of heat. This is close to the time that the Sheik utterly deteriorated physically but he can still work his ass off here. Even the ordinarily bland as all hell Rotunda shows some fire here and gets the fans popping. Volkoff was one of the wrestlers linked to Zahorian during the steroid trials and I'm watching this wondering how. The guy was seemingly always a pale, shapeless crowd killer. Rotundo plays Ricky Morton here during a long heat segment. Not the cleanest formula tag match. Windham hits a nice bulldog to a big pop, only for Sheik to save the big Russian. Fred Blassie cane shot puts Rotundo down for the three count and we have NEW Tag Team Champions! "History has been made," says Gorilla, in yet another one of his anachronisms. **1/2. Good stuff.
We head to the gorilla position where Okerlund is with the winners of the tag match. Okerlund is shocked and chagrinned. He interviews Blassie who is beside himself. Okerlund asks to see the infamous cane to which Blassie replies, "What cane? I didn't have no cane." Sheik adds, "You know Gene Mean, we proven to the thousand thousand Iranian, New York City, and a Russia, and a Arab, a all countries the best. We come a to the America to prove it. Look at us. Number one!" Tremendous stuff.
Lord Al Hayes hypes up the Bodyslam challenge, awkwardly I might add. Okerlund interviews Studd and Heenan. Studd has the bag of money which he claims was 'the bait' to get Andre to put his career on the line. Pretty clever booking. It's a nice WWF duffle bag. Were those ever offered in the merchandise catelog? I'd buy one of those in a second.
Andre the Giant vs. 'Big' John Studd - This is of course a 'Body Slam Challenge', meaning the match will only end when one man slams the other. Also at stake is $15,000 for the winner as well as Andre's career, should he lose. Studd is accompanied by Heenan, in unfortunately his only appearance of the evening. Hot match from the get go as both of these guys were majorly over, even if they couldn't do much of anything in the ring. Lots of lumbering around early but the crowd eats it up. Studd works the gimmick and tries for a slam or two on Andre. Crowd chants "Slam! Slam!" Crazy heat. Lots of rest holds here before Andre eventually gets the big slam on Studd. He gets the bag of cash and gives some to the fans ring side before the Brain gets the back and runs to the back. *
Back to Lord Al and Mene Gean for words with the ladies. Cindy Lauper cuts the promo for Richter. Richter sounds like a hick so having Lauper talk for her was a plus. Moolah is with Kai, and she too is clearly a southern gal. Gene Mean likes the shades on Moolah, as they are impressive but look silly on a 60 year old woman.
Wendi Richter vs. Lelani Kai - Match is for the Women's Championship, held by Richter. Richter, of course, would soon after this event be screwed out of her title by the mysterious Spider Woman, 12 years before the more famous Montreal Screwjob but under similar circumstances. Kai is the champion going in to this match. Lauper leads Richter to the ring to a giant pop. Realistically, women's wrestling wouldn't be this over again until 13 years later with Sable and even that is debatable. Decent generic chain wrestling starts this off. We then progress into the standard 80s women's wrestling spots(moves centered around pulling of the hair.) Richter with the airplane spin for a near fall. Kai with some crowd killing stomps for another 2 followed by a horrible looking back breaker. Kai goes to the top for a high cross body but Richter rolls through(very, very awkwardly) and wins the match and the title for the second time. Kai attacks after the bell while Moolah gets in the ring and starts taking belly-first bumps for no reason..... What the hell? She takes three or four belly bumps with no one around her. Lauper and her manager David Wolfe celebrate with Wendi Richter. 1/2*.
Okerlund is in the back with Richter who calls this the happiest second of her life. Lauper says she never doubted Richter and trash talks Moolah and Kai.
The announce team throws it to the Fink for some introductions. Guest ring announcer is Billy Martin. Monsoon says HAPPENING for the umpteenth time. Martin introduces Liberace but doesn't say what his official role in this match is. Monsoon literally says HAPPENING 60 seconds after he last said it. Liberace comes in and dances with the Rockettes. This is a happening, Monsoon once again says. I swear he's trolling me from the grave. Crowd is HOT for the intro of Muhammed Ali.
After a night where each match was preceded by an interview with the combatants, I'm shocked that we at the very least don't get to hear a Hogan promo. Roddy Piper comes out with the bag pipers along with his partner Paul Orndorff and bodyguard Bob Orton. Pat Patterson is unidentified but he is your referee, assigned by Vince in order to help out the inexperienced Mr. T. Huge pop as you would expect for Hogan, T, and Snuka.
Hulk Hogan & Mr. T vs. Paul Orndorff & Roddy Piper - Ventura says upon removing his robe that Ornorff looks like a greek god. Patterson struggles to gain control of this one even before the bell rings. Ventura reiterates his greek god comment. Monsoon calls this the 'happening of the century'. Hogan and Piper start it off but Mr. T screams for Hulk and begs him to let him get his hands on Piper. Hogan really milks it and the crowd goes ape shit for it. Piper really with some great facials as he looks disgusted by T. They trade some slaps and some chain wrestling but neither can gain the upper hand. Mr. T gets Piper up in the old airplane spin and drops him like 'yesterday's newspaper'. Tag in to Hogan and we get a pier-6 brawl with all 6 men including the managers in the ring. Ali is even forced to get in the ring to restore some order to this match. Piper decides to take a powder and get back to the locker room. Monsoon says that this wont be tolerated and that Piper and Orndorff will have to return. According to who, Monsoon? With the heels back in the ring, Hogan makes short work of the both of them. The heels finally get control through some chicanery and Hogan plays the face in peril. Orndorff and Piper used every old school heel tag team tactic in the book for monster heat from the MSG faithful. Mr. Wonderful with the BACKDROP DRIVAH! on Hogan for two. Snuka decides to get involved for no reason and out of nowhere we get the finishing spot of Bob Orton missing the cast shot from the top rope and hitting Orndorff instead. Hogan and T are your winners but the finish came out of nowhere and the match didn't have much to it. **.
They wrap up with promos from the winning team. Standard fare. Gorilla and Jesse the wrap things up on there end while Monsoon, once more for good measure, confirms that this was indeed a 'happening' as he bids farewell to the audience.
This show sucks. Well let me rephrase that, the wrestling on this show sucks. At this time, NWA had matches like Magnum T.A. and Tully Blanchard in their I Quit match and Ric Flair having a 4 star match with the top babyface in each territory in the country while on this show the top match gets 2 1/2 stars. But the in ring work isnt why this card is memorable. The production was slick for its time and the celebrity rub was top notch. The celebs didn't feel bothered to be there or that they were above the show but rather seemed enthused by the product and their stardom truly rubbed off on those they interacted with. In short, above all else, this event was indeed, 'a happening.'
----ljf----
Why didnt you continue with this blog?your commentary is fun and the blog has tons of potential :(
ReplyDelete